Friendships

I'm writing tonight just to document and journal my thoughts thats what blogs are for right?? Anyways, this evening I had a wonderful time chatting with a old high school classmate for a few minutes, and reconnecting with a childhood church friend after dinner. It really got me thinking about my experiences with friends throughout my life. Ever since I was a very small child I always felt like I was on the outside of my peer group....this coninued on through Jr. High, High School and even college. You know I had friends but I always viewed all the rest of the group of friends closer to one another than I was to any of them, and I think for the most part my interpretation was probably correct. I can remember in grade school being isolated from my group of friends because they thought I was "too preppy" and sitting and just crying on my moms lap saying "why doesn't anyone want to be my friend?" these feelings continued to haunt me at times. But here recently I seem to be blessed with a ton of friends some quite new others older friends from a different lifetime ago, like my friend Pam. We have not seen each other for close to 20 years until this evening, and yea there were some awkward silences a few times, trying to catch our breaths from catching up from so much lost time, but overall our visit was wonderful, and quite amazing how even as adults childhood friends still have a lot in common and similar beliefs and interest. And I know our friendship will grow even more now that we are adults. I'm not sure what has happened over the last year or so, am I more confident, self-assured that I don't care what others think of me, are people just more friendlier now than they were before, am I choosing better friends? I'm not quite sure what it is, but I think it's a combination of just being more mature, confident, and allowing God to work in my life. I'm more happy because of that relationship with God and so people may just be drawn to fellowship with me, not sure but I'm sure thankful and feeling blessed for the wonderful friendships I have!